Top Ramen and Denarii

Please read Matthew 18:21-35

There were twelve of us packed around a medium sized table. Four women and eight children. Intermittent screams from one high chaired toddler were answered with some Top Ramen noodles flung by the tiny occupant in the chair beside him. There were whiney protests about what had been cooked for lunch followed by, “EAT YOUR LUNCH’, hissed through clenched teeth by an exasperated mother. It was the most chaotic meal I had ever had the displeasure of being a part of. I had to retreat to the kitchen. One woman followed me in and began humming as she altered a plate of food one of her children was refusing to eat. ‘You are really patient’, I commended her. ‘Oh, it’s so easy to be patient here’, she said in a soft voice, “it’s so peaceful.’ See, I work at an emergency domestic abuse shelter. In her world, the absence of violence, not fearing for the safety of her children and not constantly being berated made for a very peaceful lunch. The second I looked at that messy dining room scene from her perspective my irritation melted.

I would like to think of myself as an empathetic person. But it is difficult for me to ask myself, “What is it really like to be you?‘ What I’m actually thinking most of the time is, ‘How is this affecting me?‘ It’s hard to see another’s perspective with that question. The servant in our passage had been forgiven a huge debt responds to his fellow servant, who owes him a small amount, by throwing him into prison. Yes, this parable is about forgiveness, but for me sometimes forgiveness is directly tied to my empathy; to my ability to ask, ‘What is it like to be you?’. If the unmerciful servant had thought about that question it shouldn’t have been too difficult to imagine it, since he had just been in that position of needing his debt forgiven! ‘Unmerciful Guy’ was asking my question, ‘How is this going to affect me?’ The bottom line is that he would be out that one hundred denarii. His perspective completely crippled his ability to be merciful to his fellow servant.

Easter. The cross. It’s all about forgiveness and mercy. The ultimate picture of empathy is Jesus. He didn’t just ask, ‘What is it like to be you?’ He became one of us.

Shannon Wittenberg